5 weeks

I love salty food! Give me more pickles! I’ve lost my sweet tooth (not such a bad thing). Last time I was pregnant wanted strawberries and honey nut cheerios. So far in the short time I’ve been pregnant I love Nacho Doritos and Fried Zucchini. Yum. I’ve been eating an apple daily too just to try for a balance.

I did four HCG levels and they are doubling just like they are supposed to. I’m excited and now anticipate the next thing on the checklist. I’m going to have an ultrasound on week seven to check for a heartbeat. I’ll be happy to see the heartbeat. What I’m really looking forward to is getting negative test results when I get the CVS around week 10. This is the test that will tell us if we are loosing another baby or getting a healthy one. I hope we fall into the 75% chance of a healthy kid this time. I want a Spinal Muscle Atrophy free baby. After that test I think I’ll truly get excited and get into organizing the nursery again and taking inventory of what items I might need still. I’m so nervous about the test results. There is nothing I can do about it though. The genetic make up of the little one is already determined at this point.

I look forward to the holidays if this baby is healthy because then I’ll be glowing and growing with pregnancy and able to truly celebrate. Otherwise it might be a murky holiday season. I’d like to think this will turn out well for us this time though.

Nail Biter!

I’ve been biting my nails the past few days wondering if I was going to have good HCG numbers or not. I had my positive pregnancy test a few days before my cycle should have started and then I did the blood test to confirm. So…the second blood test was scary because the HCG didn’t double in 48 hours. They asked me to do another day and it was hard waiting for that phone call this afternoon. I was hoping for the best and preparing for the worst. Thankfully my numbers doubled! I’m happy to still be in the game. I might have to do another test on Sunday, but they said they’d call me back about that. I’m glad it went up. Now I can relax a bit this weekend.

I’ve been bad and haven’t gone to the gym since last week. I usually go every day. I just haven’t felt well in the afternoons. I’m still doing okay today, so I’m just going to go for it. I am going to discontinue jogging and just do the elliptical or walk the treadmill for a while, but at least I want to work out 5 days a week. That’s the goal anyway.

HCG Test

So, I just had my second blood test this morning to see how my HCG levels are doing. I really hope all is going well. I’m nervous about getting the test results, but will be very relieved when I hear they are progressing as they should be. That’s what I hope for anyway. Last time I heard back from the doctor’s office around 1, so I hope my morning passes quickly. I just pray that everything goes smoothly this time.

Sweet Success

This weekend I went out of town for a few days and enjoyed spending time with some friends. I had an increased sensitivity to smells. I couldn’t even eat lunch on Saturday because my husband put vinegar on his French fries and it was just too strong.

This morning I took a pregnancy test and it was positive!!! I’m sooo excited. I’m allowing myself a little bit of excitement over just being able to conceive. Like last time I got the positive test, but I’m still doubting. I called my doctor’s office and they are going to order a blood test for me today and then again in 48 hours.

In week or two I’ll probably start worrying about what might happen when we have the CVS test to see if the baby has SMA. That will be a huge milestone for us to pass through. I have to keep reminding myself that we do have a 75% chance that all will be well for this baby and me, but it’s still a nerve racking process for sure!

I feel like I deserve a moment to be just happy about this. We have tried so hard for this and I’m not going to let negativity drag me down…yet.

We are going to keep this pregnancy to ourselves and a few friends at this point. After we get our testing done we will share the news with everyone else. That’s the plan anyway. It’s difficult to keep it inside.

Elevated Temp

This morning I woke up to an elevated temperature!!!! Now, that’s more like it. It’s great to see and I’m feeling better now. If it stays ovulated for the next two mornings I know I ovulated and then the goal is to keep seeing the temperature elevated past eighteen days and then take a pregnancy test. I’m super stoked. I usually have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning (my father would be so disappointed since he is an early bird), but today I was able to hop right out of bed and actually had time to eat breakfast at home before going to work. I had previously doing the slim fast thing twice a day. I recently bought some name brand Slim Fast instead of the yummy Costco brand shakes. Unfortunately I don’t like the flavor of the Slim Fast shake, so it’s not as appealing to me as the Costco shakes. So, I might have to find someone that likes them to give them to. I had oatmeal this morning and it was great to have a real breakfast. I got the milk out of the fridge to complete the meal and noticed a foul odor…it is only five days after the date on the carton. No biggie. I just dumped that right out and ate the oatmeal sans the milk.

Just waiting

Today is Cycle Day 15…so I’m anxiously waiting for the morning that my temperature goes up! I really, really hope to ovulate this month. I was feeling pretty optimistic until yesterday and then I started with the self-doubt. Once again today I’m feeling optimistic, so I’m just hoping that’s the hormones and things are going just as they should.

I did discover that since I started last week with two slim fast shakes a day (just on week days) and a healthy dinner my GI symptoms have pretty much settled down. This is great news. I also met one of my first weight loss goals though and I’m stoked about this. I still have a ways to go, but at least I’m headed in the right direction.

On Friday after work my husband and I decided to go out to dinner. On the way out the door I lost my footing and down I went off the front step. I twisted both ankles and cut the left one. I am super, super clumsy. What’s my deal with falling? It’s a wonder that I was on dance team in high school and made it out without breaking my leg!

In church yesterday a couple bore their testimonies and shared a little about loosing their baby in the last week or so. I was touched and my heart went out to them. I was impressed that they were able to share their feelings so soon. I have only met them in passing, but typed up a note today to send in the mail. Recently I also made contact with a second cousin who lost a baby recently. It has been nice to be able to reach out. I’m in a much healthier place right now than I had been previously. It’s a good thing!

I guess I should mention...

I guess I should let the reader in the loop about my IUI. It was cancelled for this month because the doctor is on vacation when I would need it. Allow me please to express my dissapointment and I'll admit, a little bitterness too. I was so excited because it was such an unexpected surprise to have an IUI done, but then I was brought down again when I heard the news. I had some left over Clomid at home, so I told the nurse I'll do one more Clomid cycle and at the very least I'll ovulate and get me on the road to IUI sooner. I hope that he isn't planning a vacation in September. Poor planning on their part if you asked me.

Almost ovulation time

I went to see The Fray concert recently with my friend and I have to admit that it was nice not to hear the F-bomb between and during every song as was the case with the last concert I attended (Ozzfest). It was a nice, mixed crowd. Grandparents brought kids out and it was fun to watch the grandparents dancing to the music. There were two opening bands and the first band said they just got finished playing some of the Warped Tour dates. They sounded much like a backyard band to me. I was pleasantly surprised with how good The Fray sounded. I have only heard a few of their songs and I was mainly going because my friend didn’t want to go alone. Now I’m getting excited for the Warped Tour.

I should be ovulating any day now! I had a dip in temperature yesterday and that happened a few cycles ago just before ovulation. My temperature was slightly higher today. It usually takes 4 days to get super high after the dip, so I’m keeping my fingers crossed that this is an ovulation cycle. Of course my ultimate hope is that this is my pregnancy cycle, but I’ll take it a step at a time. I’m on cycle day 12 right now. I took my Clomid on days 3-7, so I was hoping to ovulate a little earlier in the cycle. Yay. Even if I don’t get pregnant this time ovulating will help to save time in the coming weeks to get my IUI. If and when I ovulate I only have a two week wait until my period starts and then I can start planning the IUI stuff. If I didn’t ovulate I’d have to wait until two weeks after when my period should have started and then start taking Provera again for another week and then wait for the cycle to begin again. I’d much rather do the ovulation thing since it’s quicker.